If you have spent any time around me, you have heard me use this expression. Maybe even to an obnoxious degree.
Even still, I feel like it is such a crucial part to healthy living, and healthy relationships, I can't see myself changing that anytime soon.
There have been many times in my life, or in the life of close friends and family, where tension or a conflict has come up, and the best answer is simply an honest conversation.
Yet an honest conversation is not on their mind for a potential solution.
In the Old Testament there is a prophet named Samuel. Samuel was a good man, and a godly man. People respected him, and God trusted him. He did what he was supposed to, and people saw that.
The problem is, Samuel had a couple sons who were not like their dad. In fact, they were kind of the opposite of their dad.
So we see in 1 Samuel 8:5 God's people say to Samuel, "Behold, you are old and your sons do not walk in your ways. Now appoint for us a king to judge us like all the nations."
Rather than talk to Samuel about the need to confront his sons, or relay the people's displeasure with how Samuel's sons were acting; they chose to make a major sweeping change of how they operate. They didn't want God to be their King any longer, they wanted a man for a king.
This story in Samuel is pretty complex with a lot of other factors to consider, but this big idea is pretty easily applicable to our daily lives.
How many times do we make a major change, or go out of our way to avoid someone rather than just talk about what is wrong?
How many friends or co-workers do you have that your stomach secretly turns as they do or say something you don't like? Why don't you say anything about it?
Life is messy, and complicated. Relationships at work or at home aren't any different. That doesn't mean we shouldn't try our best to work through and deal with the issues that come up along the way.
Sure, we should be gracious to each other when we have an off day. Yes, we should always choose to forgive when someone hurts or lets us down.
We should also commit to have honest conversations when there is tension or a difficult situation we are facing.
So here is my challenge to you. Sit down with your friend about what you are feeling, and talk to them about it. Sit down with your family member and express to them what you are seeing.
Approach the conversation with the desire to see things improve, or be restored.
It may feel uncomfortable, it may be awkward, and you may even word something in a way you didn't intend; but at least you are talking about it.
Choose to have an honest conversation, and you will see, it wasn't as bad as you thought, and it may even work out to be a benefit in disguise.
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